Episode

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-10-14

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework How much do you rely on others to sustain your dharma understanding? How often do you quote other authorities to give your dharma points credibility? The spirit of free inquiry requires freedom from all authority. Once you have freed yourself from outer authority there remains the inward authority of your views and opinions. If you think you already know the answer, you cannot inquire into the question with innocence. Reflect on your assumptions about life and ask yourself if you have ever really questioned these deeply? Look at one of your assumptions such as the belief that you are separate from others and that your experience of loneliness is valid. Who or what do you depend on to believe in this assumption? How can free inquiry release you from that belief?
Inquiry is the willingness to turn around and look behind the excuses and reactivity. You inquire through silent observation not in thinking about the problem. To inquire is to enter the unknown. You do not know where this investigation will lead nor how you will change as a result of it. Pick a troubling emotion that usually signals a reactive pattern such as anger, fear, annoyance, or loneliness. When you catch yourself reacting, ask yourself, “What is really happening here?” Be quiet and observe how difficult it is to let the emotion be and how excuses and blame arise from that difficulty. Notice how deeply entrenched the patterns of escape are conditioned. Now ask, “What does this emotion say about me?” and see what arises from the question. Perhaps it confirms a personal fear or self-belief. Finally ask, “Is this (belief, fear) true?” Do not think your way through this. Let the silence reveal the patterns as they arise.

TalkID=710 SeriesID=30

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-09-30

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework From time to time all of us question how well our meditation practice is going. Some of us go further and doubt whether we are up to the task and feel as if we are failing in our efforts. This sense of personal failure is self-doubt. This week look at how you are relating to your practice and see the subtle self-judgments associated with it. Self-doubt usually contains the belief that “I will never….” Feel the self-doubt as it arises with the judgments. Let the experience of your self-doubt be your meditation practice when this occurs. Allow the self-doubt its full expression and feel the pain that drives it. Release yourself from any belief about your incompetence. How can you doubt your ability to practice when you can always begin again?

TalkID=707 SeriesID=30

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-09-16

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework The Buddha’s discourse to the Kalamas encouraged them to open beyond dogma, rules, and the need to know. Opening beyond what we know is both nourishing and fearful. We usually seek answers to protect us from that opening. Each of us has an area of interest we can pursue through a question. Questions allow us to regain the innocence suggested by this sutta. What question(s) naturally arise(s) about dharma in your life? For example a question might come up about whether anything in life is truly permanent or whether you really are in control. Let the question unfold as a living reality. See if you can live within the wonder of the question without seeking an immediate answer. What happens to the sense of “you, the knower” when you live a question?

TalkID=698 SeriesID=30

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-06-29

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework What prevents you from acting on what you know to be true? What forces of fear and desire pull you in a counter direction to being responsible?

This week live with the question, “What prevents me from being responsible here and now?” Be aware of superficial explanations about your circumstances or busyness. Continue to ask the question through the range of excuses. Whenever the mind stops and says, “This is the reason,” pause, and ask yourself if this is true. Is your ability to hold responsibility strengthened through living this question?

TalkID=766

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-06-24

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework What strategies do you employ to keep from paying attention? Which of your intentional behaviors dull your mind (shopping, surfing the Web, telephoning, emailing, eating, entertainment)? Can you feel the pain that drives these strategies? Are you able to access the pain without moving back into unskillful dulling behavior?
Practice a period of abstinence this week in which the drugging behavior is relinquished. For example, spend a day or more without turning on the computer, TV, or cell phone. The mind can be very irritable during detoxification. Be patient with the irritability. Replace the dulling behavior with the question, “Where is aliveness here and now?” Don’t allow the question to direct you towards more enjoyable alternatives, but toward your natural aliveness in this moment.

TalkID=696 SeriesID=29

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-06-17

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework The Buddha said, “One who is about to admonish another should realize within himself or herself five qualities before doing so:
(1) At the right time will I speak, not at the wrong time. (2) In truth shall I speak, not in falsehood. (3) Gently will I speak, not harshly. (4) For their benefit will I speak, not for their harm. (5) With kindly intent will I speak, not with anger.
This week use these five qualities to govern your speech. At first your speech may seem a little stilted and pretentious as if you were politician trying to always say the right thing, but the real intent is to speak from the heart rather than from reactivity. Be patient with the process of unlearning your old style of communication and learning a new one.

TalkID=695 SeriesID=29

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-06-10

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework Notice how thinking keeps you from being sensitive to your inward and outward experience. Go outdoors and take a walk. As you move around open the senses to the sights, sounds, and smells of the environment. Notice how the day’s events impact the listening. Watch how “the story of the me” forms around this sense data (my flowers look so good this time of year, I wonder if this runny nose is the beginning of a cold or just allergies, the sound of that airplane reminds me of our vacation in July). Now practice presence and release yourself from the thinking. Notice what difference that makes to your availability and sensitivity. From this exercise what does being sensitive mean?

TalkID=768 SeriesID=19

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-05-27

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework Notice how much time you spend with sexually related thoughts. How much of your energy is consumed in that direction and how many of your interactions have a sexual overtone? How far do you go in playing out the fantasies? When does your sexual energy interfere with your commitments of heart? Do you use your sexual energy to gain power or manipulate the situation in any way? Is your sexual life in order?
This week bring a concerted effort to watching the forms and displays of your sexual energy. Notice the positive and negative effects of the energy. During sexual activity are you consumed with greed and desire or is there an affectionate sensitivity to the whole person? What role does intimacy play in your sexual activities?

TalkID=694 SeriesID=29

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-05-13

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework This precept is about the tension between replenishing and reducing. There are many opportunities each day to strengthen generosity or selfishness. Living with the gross and subtle forms of this precept will show you the conflict between wise and unwise view. Use the following mantra this week: “Where is generosity in this moment?” This question points towards the conflict between your self-interest and interconnectedness. Open to the contraction of heart and the lack of tolerance. Watch the subtle infractions of this precept, how you take disproportionately of time, space, and objects. Notice when you “take” advantage of someone. The most subtle form of this precept implies “taking just what is given” in the moment and not adding anything to it. Suspend your thoughts, conclusions, opinions, and views. Receive the moment just as it is.

TalkID=693 SeriesID=29

Teacher: Rodney Smith

Date: 2002-04-29

Venue: Seattle Insight Meditation Center

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Homework The precept to refrain from taking life is concerned with developing sensitivity to all forms and expressions of life. Where do you lose that sensitivity? Although no being is dismissed as irrelevant, “refraining from” is not the same as “thou shall not.” What is the difference? Is it possible to live and never kill other life forms? This week build in the pause of “refrain from” and use the space to connect with life rather than eliminating it. The gross infractions are more obvious but the subtle components of this precept might include any dismissive or negating behavior of another. What are the effects on this precept when you only consider your own needs? How is the hurt from your dismissive actions rationalized (“She deserved it anyway….”)?

TalkID=658 SeriesID=29